The Writing Diva Moving Service

Open letter to outgoing President George W. Bush
From: Writing Diva

Dear Mr. President (but not for much longer),

As of this writing, you and the Bush family are expected to leave the White House in 54 days and 17 hours. (Oh, I'm sorry. Am I counting?) As a veteran of several moves over the past two years, I am very experienced in packing and transporting household goods and belongings safely from one place to another. (In your case, Crawford, Texas.) So, I would like to offer the services of the Writing Diva Moving Service.

Without having to pay, my company (actually, my siblings, cousins, and interested friends) can have your belongings all packed up and ready to go. We'll even pay for the truck or trucks to move your stuff. We can even offer sedatives for your Scottish terriers Barney and Miss Beazley for the long drive back to the Lone Star State.

All my moving service would request is that you and every vestige of your existence in the White House be completely gone by noon Eastern Standard Time on January 20, 2009. After all, a new tenant and his family are moving in at, say, 12:01 p.m.

Do you need bubble wrap? Foam plastic peanuts? Boxes? I can lend you my hand truck, if you need it.

May I recommend Home Depot for spare boxes?

Just contact me at my Web site, and my service will be more than happy to help.

Just make sure when you leave that the door doesn't hit ya where the Good Lord split ya!

Writing Diva